|Dating / 1:22 AM - Tuesday May 17, 2005|
Taking things slow..
Okay, so, I just cooked dinner for the girl I have been seeing for about a month and took her to a resort to walk around. So, we were at the resort walking around and holding hands. We sat down and ended up talking about 2 hours about her past relationships and why they went wrong. She told me that she wants to take it slow, and I told her the same, because all of the relationships that I have rushed into, only last a couple of weeks, so I told her that I felt the same way. Problem is, how slow should I take it? I told her that I wanted to take things slow so that our relationship is long-term and doesn't end abruptly. I do want to take things slow and I would like to be with her for a long term. So, how slow should I go? She said holding hands and the night I kissed her was too fast for her right now, since she just got out of a relationship where she was almost engaged. So, when is the right time to start holding hands and kissing then? How slow should I go to make this relationship last a long time? I like her a lot, she is the most comfortable girl I have been with ever, and she is gorgeous, by the way, I told her these things the other night at the resort. So, please help me out on keeping this relationship long-term. I would appreciate any and all answers, thanks!!
- Asked by A Mr. Nice Guy, Male, 18-21, Phoenix, Veterinary
Well when I met my husband at age 19, he saw me every night for a year and then we got married. He had just come back from Vietnam when we met. Taking it slow is the opposite of all that. I would let myself see where it goes with one date, then another and just enjoy each other's company. It doesn't mean you can't kiss her and hold her hand. Talk to her, get her input. You both may WANT to take it slow but as you are together, you may change your minds. Or you may not hit it off as well as you had thought you would. Treat her the way you treat someone you really like, with respect and candor, and it will have a life of its own. Every relationship is different, and you will just know what's up as you are into it, converse and spend time together. There is no set rule about anything. Good luck.
Man, I dont know how much slower she wants you to take things. I think from what you have said things are going pretty slow. I would just try and keep communicating with her and work through it. Good luck